Lady in bridal shop: What kind of dress do you think you’d like? Me: Not long or white, not strapless or halter… bright colour, knee-length full skirt, no veil? Lady in bridal shop: Yeah, we don’t have anything like that. Why don’t you let me bring you some things I think you might like? Me: Sure, you’ve known me for 30 seconds now, that seems foolproof.